Cursed memories
by MoonsPoet
Summary: After being held captive for 28 years Belle is finally free. But while everyone else gets their memories back after the curse is broken she does not. Rumpelstiltskin is livid as he watches helpless while she builds a new life away from him. Probably a two-shot but this story is not going to have a happy ending so if that is not your cup of tea (pun intended) feel free not to read.
1. Cursed Memories

**A/N:** This story is a combination of re-watching 5x10 (but this story starts at the last episode of season 1) and listening to Michael Bolton`s "How am I supposed to live without you", he was holding a damn tea cup in the video and this happened. Plus it`s raining and the sky is grey so I am under the weather. Please don`t kill me.

BTW I don not like Will but since the show already had them together and I could`t think of anyone else to pair Belle up with we are stocked with him. Also Belle is not Lacey I do not like her.

 **Disclaimer:** I do not own Once Upon a Time or any of its characters.

* * *

Rumpelstiltskin kept staring at the dammed envelop, Belle`s wedding invitation, thinking the pain is unbearable. He was suffering again just like when he thought she had died. But who was he kidding? That pain was much worse than this one. At least now he could remember her smile while she shared her plans and the sparkle in her eyes as she handed him the wedding invitation and know that at least something was right.

He had been drinking Scotch since that moment like there was no tomorrow. Deep down maybe he was just expecting his liver to give away so he could die before her big day. But he was still the Dark One and right now living forever seemed much more of a curse than a blessing.

While sitting there, with the glass in his hand and the bottle on the table, he remembered what was the happiest day of his life: the day when Belle first showed up in his store after years of captivity.

* * *

 **2 Years Before**

 _He could barely believe she was really there, thinking he was losing his mind or that it was another plan from the Evil Queen, but one touch to her shoulder told him she was real. She, of course could not remember how he was, but that was ok. He just had to wait and once the Saviour broke the curse everything would get back to normal, he would be granted a second chance with his True Love and they could finally be together and look for his son._

 _When they came back from the well he realized the curse was indeed broken and everyone remembered who they really were except Belle. She kept looking at him like he was a stranger to her and while everyone was hugging and kissing, happy to see their friends and loved ones, her behaviour and emotions towards him were exactly the same as when she walked through the store._

 _He left Belle on the store with some fresh clothes and food and went to the Evil Queen for explanations and revenge (not exactly in that order). She said it was her gift to Belle so she did not had to live with the burden of loving a monster. That caught him out of guard but he didn't back down. He marked her and summoned the soul sucker but of course the Charmings had to get in the way. She had also advised him making a potion could risk Belle lose her mind for good and although he was not sure he could trust her but he did not want to take any risks._

 _The next couple of days were spent taking care of Belle, making sure she was healthy and was eating properly. But as time passed by she was getting restless of doing nothing and although she could not remember being Belle in her heart she was still the same person he knew and loved so he had to do something about it because she was not capable of staying put. So knowing her passion for books he took her to the library and asked her if she wanted to work there. She hugged him so tightly he almost lost his balance only her arms and his cane preventing him from falling. She apologized and kissed his cheek as a thank you._

 _Of course working in the library meant she had her own apartment and so she moved out of his house happy she was no longer a **burden** to him – he smiled to himself – if only she knew how much of a **burden** she really was. Once she got out of his house he felt like her life started. She made friends, reunited with her father and hang out on the city, occasionally visiting him for everything he had done for her. One of the friends she made was called Will Scarlet, friends of Robin Hood, the man she freed all those years ago. This was all a sick joke from the universe._

 _From that day forward he started to see them together around the city and one thing led to the other and suddenly they were in love and planning to get married – Rumpelstiltskin`s heart tightened in his chest – that day where he saw them kissing was one of the worst days of his life and he remembered drinking everything he had in the store and in the house._

Rumpelstiltskin cleared his head of the memories and got up. Tomorrow was Belle`s wedding day and he refused to look less than presentable for her so he put the Scotch away and went to bed. He knew he wouldn't sleep but he would at least try to clear the numbness.

* * *

 **Next day – The Wedding Day**

Belle and Will`s wedding was going to happen at the same well where he first took her in Storybrook. She had shared with him that it was such a beautiful place and could not think of a better place for the ceremony to happen.

He put their gift down, a tea set, in the designated place, and took a seat at the back. He watched as Belle`s father, Maurice (Moe in this land), handed his daughter to Will, beaming while staring at him when he took his place. He watched as Belle and Will exchanged their wedding vows, promising eternal love and fidelity to each other. Belle looked like she was glowing, the sunlight hit her in the right way making her look like some sort of angelic creature.

-Mr. Gold you made it. – Belle said while approaching him.

-Of course dearie. I was not going to miss such an important day in your life. – He said while she hugged him. – By the way you are stunning the dress fits you perfectly.

-Thank you – Belle answered blushing. – Please enjoy yourself. – She said after Will called her and walked away.

Rumpelstiltskin nodded when she left him and Maurice approached him. He was going to leave but the other man stopped him. – Are you in a hurry Gold? Because I want to talk to you.

-Be quick. – Was the dry answer Maurice got.

\- You know there was a moment I wanted to be sorry for you because of this cruel joke but I can`t. Every time I look at Belle and see her smile I am just happy she cannot remember you and what you put her through in the Dark Castle. My daughter is a princess and you treated her like a servant this is your price.

-Do not talk about what you do not know. – Rumpelstiltskin answered aggressively trying to keep his emotions in check. He could not hurt Maurice or Belle was not going to get close to him ever again. Maybe that was not such a bad idea but he could not be the one to ruin her happiness.

-Oh my goods you love her. – Maurice noticed while laughing. – This is too good to be truth. To her you are just a pathetic old man, older than every inhabitant of Storybrook together maybe this is the way the universe had found for you to payback all your bad deeds. She sees you as a father not someone she could love.

Those words hit Rumpelstiltskin as a ton of bricks. Maurice was right. It was not just that Belle could not remember him she saw him as the man who took care of her when she needed. Maurice left with a smile in his face and Rumpelstiltskin decided it was time for him to go home and forget his sorrow while dreaming of what their life could have been. Because deep down in his hearth the man that Rumpelstiltskin once was knew he has not worthy of her.


	2. Blessed Moments

**A/N** : Thank you all who to took the time to read this story.

* * *

The bell on top of the door ringed signalling a costumer. When Rumpelstiltskin turned around his face became pale. It was Belle and her face had the same colour of his. She had tears on her eyes and looked terrified.

Rumpelstiltskin was not sure of what to do but he went to her and hugged her. She clings to him like her life depends on it. When she was calmer he took her to the backroom so he could find out what had happened.

-Belle please talk to me. What happened? Was it Will? Did he hurt you? – Rumpelstiltskin was starting to boil inside and he would rip his heart out of his chest, like he always wanted. It did not mattered that the child she was carrying would be fatherless. He could take on that role.

Belle shook her head. –It was not him. He is a good man but... he is not you Rumpel.

Rumpelstiltskin`s eyes doubled in size. She said his name. His real name.

-Belle, you remember. – He said while holding her hand.

-I do. – She said through damp eyes.

-But how?

-Well, after so many times of our memories being erased little details of my life came back to me and last night while I was dreaming about you it all came back to me. And I knew I had to see you and talk to you and explain everything.

-Belle, there is nothing to explain. You could not remember.

-But you are my True Love. I should have known.

-I think you did. I mean you trusted me when I was just a complete a stranger. You accepted my help and you even lived here with me with no fear at all even though everyone is scared of me.

-Maybe, I do not know. Since we knew each other better I just wanted to be with you. While we lived at the Dark Castle I kept thinking of what our life together might be. Even when I was locked up by Regina, before the curse, I kept thinking if I ever had the chance I would come back to you and we could be together maybe even have a child but now nothing of this can happen.

-It still can Belle, if you want to.

-Rumple, I love you but I cannot just leave Will like this, specially with a baby on the way. You know me, this is not who I am. I do not flee from my commitments no matter how scared or displeased I am with them.

He smiled, that`s how she became his maid by being brave and putting everyone`s else need before her owns. -I know Belle and I will never ask you to anything against your will again. –He put his hand over his heart. -I swear. I learned my lesson all those years ago.

-Thank you. I love you Rumpelstiltskin.

-And I love you Belle. – He leaned into her and for a moment her breath got caught on her chest thinking he was going to kiss her but he just kissed the corner of her mouth. He might be a Beast but he was still a gentleman and he was going to respect the lady.

* * *

Will Scarlet passed by Mr. Gold shop almost every day. Every time the man saw him he would stare intently at him. It always made him feel uncomfortable. But when he passed with Belle or even when they both went inside Mr. Gold was nothing less than a pleasant and welcoming man. But the feeling was always there. Was he getting crazy or was something really going on? Maybe he was just picking up on the town`s general fear of the sinister man. But one thing he could not deny: he was really warm to Belle. Will could see it every time he saw them together. Mr. Gold would smile and his eyes shined.

But something always bothered him. Why would he help a woman he has never meet to start it? Or maybe he knew her. – Will thought to his buttons. Something was afoot. He decided to investigate.

* * *

While Will investigated without Belle knowing she started to spend more and more time with the frightening man. Sometimes even after a long day of work at the library she would pass by his store and help him with the inventory or whatever needed to be done and then they would drink tea and reminisce about the past. Most of the time Will had to go and pick her up or reminded her it was time to come home.

One of those days, while at the store helping Rumple close for the day, Belle felt sharp pain. – Belle are you ok? - Rumpelstiltskin asked clearly scared.

-I think my water just broke. – Belle answered her eyes in complete shock.

-Let`s go. – Rumpelstiltskin grabbed her hand before she could even take notice and took her to his car driving her to the hospital.

Since Will was working and the hospital could not get a hold of him (which turned out to be perfect) Belle begged him to go with her to the delivery room. So being the love fool Rumpelstiltskin was he seat there by her side, hold her hand (which she almost crashed not even being the Dark One could save him from the pain of giving birth) and whispered words of comfort.

-It`s a boy. – Dr. Whale stated while holding the baby.

-Bring him here Rumple. –Belle asked flashing a big smile.

-Me?

-Yes, Rumple go and bring the baby here. I want to see him. – Belle said with puppy eyes. With wobbly legs Rumpelstiltskin meet the doctor and held Belle`s baby. He was so tiny, of course but had an amazing set of lungs. The Dark One hold him close to his chest and the baby immediately stopped crying and opened his eyes to stare deeply at the ones belonging to the person holding him. Rumpelstiltskin had to admit it was a powerful moment even if the baby was not his and even if the moment was not as powerful as when he held his own son for the first time. But it was pretty close. He turned to Belle and smiled while handing her the precious bundle and saying. –He has your beautiful eyes Belle.

* * *

Being a thief, Will was able to get his hand on Henry`s book and a couple of months later he has reading the Dark One` story with his maid, Belle, his Belle, in the Enchanted Forest. So what happened, why did she married him? Was this the reason why he was son interested in his son, well Belle `son? Curiosity and a lot of not so good feelings were killing him but Belle never brought up any kind of subject where he could ask her the truth and she was still by his side. Although he had to admit she is not the exact same woman he married.

* * *

As Bayden grow up Will realised it was not just his wife who was smitten or fascinated by the mysterious man. Every time he could not find one of them, or both, he just had to go to Mr. Gold`s pawnshop and there Belle was with her nose on a book while Bay as carefully holding some old object dutifully listening the Dark One telling him the story of how he acquired it, at least the ones he could tell to a young boy. Belle glancing now and then to the two of them with a smile plastered on her face to the story that she herself had listen all those years ago and giving her own input,, usually leaving Rumpelstiltskin flustered and disconcerted.

So now Will had two people to pick up at the store. His son always saying goodbye to the pawnbroker with a hug and a "See you tomorrow Mr. Gold". Hence, after 6 years of passing by or going into the same damned store every day Will knew that although it might be his hand Belle was holding in her mind that hand belonged to the man behind the counter and in that moment the thief realised he had stolen their happy ending but he was a thief after all. Still, Will was no foul; every time he and Belle would pass by the shop she would look inside and smile to the owner and so would his son. In his heart Will knew that although Belle was by his side, her heart belonged to Rumpelstiltskin. It was ironic actually Will mused. The Dark One owned the only heart he would never rip out of its owner`s chest.


End file.
